Pitru Paksha: what should be done and what should be avoided?

In the Sanatana tradition, Brahm Bodhi explains, there is a sacred duty to express reverence and gratitude towards one’s departed parents and ancestors. The very word Shraddha is derived from shraddha, meaning faith, reverence and heartfelt devotion. Therefore, the essence of Shraddha is not money or display, but the loving remembrance of one’s ancestors and the offering of Tarpana (water), food, charity and good deeds in their memory.

The three forms of Shraddha

Broadly, he says, Shraddha may be understood in three forms.

1. Special pilgrimage Shraddha performed once in a lifetime

There is a very ancient and highly revered tradition of performing special Shraddha and Pinda Daan for one’s ancestors at Gaya. Pinda Daan and Shraddha are also performed at Haridwar and other sacred places, but Gaya has acquired special prominence for this purpose. Generally, this special pilgrimage Shraddha for an ancestor is performed once in one’s lifetime. At Gaya, under the guidance of priests well versed in the rituals, Sankalpa, Tarpana, Pinda Daan and the other prescribed rites are performed.

2. Annual Shraddha on the death anniversary

According to tradition, the annual Shraddha of a departed person is performed every year on the corresponding tithi of the Hindu lunar calendar on which the person passed away. It is an annual expression of reverence towards that particular departed person, and includes Tarpana, the offering of food, feeding others and giving charity according to one’s means.

3. Shraddha and Tarpana for all ancestors during Pitru Paksha

Pitru Paksha is a special period of approximately fifteen days dedicated to the collective remembrance of all one’s departed ancestors and the offering of Tarpana to them. According to the Sanatana tradition, offerings of water and food, charity and good deeds performed for the ancestors during this period carry special significance.

During Pitru Paksha, Brahm Bodhi says, it is desirable, if possible, to invite a knowledgeable, sincere and contented Brahmin priest and have a simple Shraddha and Tarpana performed under his guidance. This helps preserve the scripturally established tradition and also honours and supports the priestly community that has kept these religious practices alive through the generations. The priest should be offered food, due respect and a reasonable Dakshina according to one’s means. There is, however, no need to make the ceremony unnecessarily elaborate or expensive — for Shraddha is primarily about reverence, not wealth.

A simple Tarpana one may perform oneself

If a suitable priest is not available, or if the expense cannot be afforded, a person may perform a simple Tarpana himself or herself.

After bathing, he explains, one should wear clean clothes and sit facing south. Taking clean water, black sesame seeds and Kusha grass, one offers the water while reverentially remembering one’s parents and all departed ancestors. If their names and Gotra are known, they may be recited; if the Gotra is not known, there is no reason for anxiety. If one knows the appropriate mantras, they may be recited; otherwise, one may simply remember the ancestors and make the offering sincerely in one’s own language.

The assistance of a priest may be taken on one day; it is not necessary to engage a priest on all fifteen days. On the remaining days, one may personally make a simple offering of water to the ancestors.

What should be done during Pitru Paksha?

• Lead a sattvic, simple and disciplined life. Remember the ancestors, offer Tarpana and make some charity in their name.
• Offer food or food grains to a person in need. According to tradition, a portion of food should also be set aside for cows, dogs, crows and other living beings.
• Even a person of very limited means should try to give something in charity, however small. It is the spirit of giving that matters, not the monetary value of the gift.

What should be avoided?

• Avoid non-vegetarian food, alcohol and other intoxicants. Traditionally, foods considered tamasic, such as onion and garlic, are also avoided.
• Avoid unnecessary indulgence, luxury, anger, quarrels and ostentatious display.
• Avoid falsehood and conduct that is inconsistent with a life of purity and self-restraint.

The essence of Pitru Paksha

The essence of Pitru Paksha, Brahm Bodhi concludes, is very simple: remember your ancestors with reverence, express gratitude for what you have received from them, offer Tarpana, and in their name bring nourishment or relief to another human being or living creature.